Explore how reflecting on mortality encourages facing fears, embracing discomfort, and living a more meaningful, purpose-driven life.
“Death only happens to other people.” – David Whyte
You’re Going to Die
This month, I want to bring up something we all know deep down but often push aside. You’re going to die. I don’t know when, and neither do you. None of us do. But it’s a reality we all face.
It’s uncomfortable to think about, isn’t it? But what if reflecting on our mortality didn’t make us anxious but instead made life sharper, more meaningful, and more alive?
Memento Mori
The Stoics had a practice called memento mori—which translates to “Remember you will die.” The idea isn’t to dwell on death in a way that feels heavy or overwhelming but to use it as a tool. A reminder to take stock of our lives, focus on what truly matters, and let go of the stuff that doesn’t.
When I reflect on this myself, it changes how I see my world. I‘m more grateful for my family, their health, and the little, everyday moments we share. I’m more patient in situations that would typically frustrate me. And most importantly, it brings clarity to what I value.
But here’s the thing—thinking about the end of life has a way of sharpening regrets too. And that’s not a bad thing. It’s a chance to ask yourself some powerful questions.
What Really Matters
What would need to happen in your life so that you feel at peace when the time comes? I’m guessing it wouldn’t be about trophies, fancy job titles, or a collection of stuff cluttering up your garage.
Instead, you might think about things like watching your kids grow into amazing adults. Or those family camping trips where you laughed around the fire. Or the relationships you nurtured, even when life got hard.
Interestingly, the things that we hold most dear often come from moments that were difficult, even painful, at the time. Growth has a way of disguising itself as discomfort.
Fear as a Guide
So here’s a thought: What if, instead of avoiding fear and discomfort, we got curious about it? What if, instead of letting fear hold us back, we saw it as a guide—a signpost pointing us toward something meaningful?
What if, the next time we felt afraid, we thought, This is where the good stuff starts?
Our fears can teach us a lot if we let them. But here’s the trick: fear is usually pointing you in the wrong direction. It says, “Run.” But maybe what we need to do is walk toward it instead. We try facing fears.
A Challenge for You
This month, I challenge you to reflect on one or two fears taking up space in your mind. Maybe it’s about money, preparing your kids for college, or finding your footing in a new chapter of life.
Take some time to listen to those fears. What are they really about? How likely are the worst-case scenarios? Could you sit with that fear, understand it, and still take the next step forward?
Remember, life is happening right now. It’s not about avoiding fear but about moving forward even with it by your side. Often, the life you want is on the other side of those uncomfortable moments.
